Interim Prime Minister Scott “ScoMo” Morrison has told colleagues that he plans to increase the current Newstart allowance to include a free copy of the prosperity gospel to all recipients. “It would be easy for my Government to give more… Read More ›
Insiders
Katter Calls For A Cull Of Vegans In Order To Save The Endangered Hog’s Breath Cafe
The member for Kennedy has called upon the Government to arrange for a cull of vegans in order to help save the endangered Hog’s Breath Cafe. “It’s all well and good for the Government to be talking about tax cuts… Read More ›
Dutton Demands More Powers Or Else He’ll Piss All Over The Floor
Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has demanded that Prime Minister Scott Morrison and Cabinet give him the power to exclude people from the country or else he will piss all over the floors of parliament. “This is just… Read More ›
Nation Stunned To Learn That Man Who Can’t Do Basic Arithmetic Still Has Job As Finance Minister
Australians were shocked to learn that a man who last year struggled with basic arithmetic, Matthias Cormann is in fact still the Nation’s Finance Minister. “Him, really? The bloke that bungled the numbers in the leadership challenge is in charge… Read More ›
Christopher Pyne Denies Any Conflicts Over New Role As Fixer For Ernst And Young
Recently retired federal minister Christopher Pyne has denied there is any conflict of interest in his taking on a new role as a consultant to Ernst and Young in the fixing industry. “Yes I was a fixer for the government… Read More ›
Dutton Replaces Strangling Puppies With Meditation
Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has told reporters how he has replaced his old hobby of strangling puppies with a new hobby of meditating. “The old Peter would come home after a day of failed leadership attempts and… Read More ›