Prime Minister (ed. please check if this is still the case) Malcolm Turnbull has stunned the mathematics world by claiming that the number 40 is now the new number 30. “Young people are maturing a lot later in life now… Read More ›
Malcolm Turnbull
Dutton Offers Family Visas To South African Potato Farmers
Immigration Minister and aspiring super villain Peter Dutton has reached out to South African potato farmers with an offer of a family visa in an effort to aide their move to Australia. “The thought of those poor white farmers suffering… Read More ›
Dutton Accused Of Visa Cheating After Being Caught With Au Pairs In His Pocket
The Minister for Immigration and aspiring Bond villain Peter Dutton has denied claims he cheated. Despite being caught on camera adjusting a visa with an au pair that he pulled out of his pocket. “This is 100% fake news. Those… Read More ›
“Australian Cricketers Have Brought Shame To Our Nation” Says Nation That Tortures Children
The Australian public has condemned their cricket team over the cheating scandal that has engulfed the team’s South African tour. Calling it the darkest day in Australian history, the emphasised it was the worst thing any Australian has ever done,… Read More ›
Dutton Sticks Fingers In Ears And Screams La La La At Latest Press Conference
The Minister for Immigration Peter Dutton has put on a baffling display at his latest press conference by sticking his fingers in his ears and shouting ‘La, La, La’ repeatedly when asked a question by a journalist from the ABC…. Read More ›
Abbott Joins Dutton To Call For The Wallabies To Be Renamed The All Whites
Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott, famous for once knighting a Prince, has joined Minister for Immigration Peter Dutton in calling for Australia’s rugby union team the Wallabies to be renamed ‘the All Whites.’ “I believe a lot of Australians would… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 