A team of professional zombie hunters has been hired to stand guard over parliament house in Canberra after several eyewitnesses reported sighting the decaying corpse of former PM Tony Abbott shuffling around the building. “I was scrubbing dried up spit… Read More ›
Malcolm Turnbull
Justin Trudeau Freaked Out Over Malcolm Turnbull Liking All His Facebook Pictures
Canadian Prime Minister and star of Instagram Justin Trudeau has asked his country’s ambassador to Australia to convey to the Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull that he is a little freaked out over Mr Turnbull liking all of his photos on… Read More ›
Peter Dutton’s Mum Calls On The Other Kids In Parliament To Play With Her Son
Minister for Immigration and Border Protection Peter Dutton’s mum has today taken aside all members of the government and scolded them for not including her son in their games. Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull was singled out over his refusal to… Read More ›
Australia To Declare War Against San Francisco Over Jarryd Hayne
The Prime Minister of Australia Malcolm Turnbull has met with American President Barack Obama at the G20 to declare his country’s intentions to declare war against the Californian city of San Francisco over their snubbing of star athlete Jarryd Hayne…. Read More ›
Bill Shorten Tipped To Knife Himself After Disastrous Polling
Opposition leader Bill Shorten, a man who lists the musical Sweeney Todd as his greatest inspiration, is rumoured to be pondering the idea of knifing himself as leader of the Australian Labor Party (ALP) and replacing himself, bizarrely, with himself…. Read More ›
Canadian Election Result Major Shock To Those Who Had No Idea Canada Was Having An Election
The defeat of Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper has surprised a majority of the world who had no inkling that Canada was even holding an election. “Wow, I guess it’s something I should have been aware of but to be… Read More ›