Prime Minister Scott Morrison has lifted spirits in the Coalition party room by pulling out his favourite party trick of asking the Finance Minister Matthias Cormann to do some basic maths. ”Scotty really knows how to keep spirits high,” said… Read More ›
Matthias Cormann
China Answers PM’s Text With “New Phone Who Dis?”
A relieved Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has revealed the recent trade disputes between Australia and China is a simple misunderstanding after China answered Australia’s text with, “New phone who dis?” “I do admit I was a bit worried when… Read More ›
Dutton, Cormann And Joyce Call For Increased Funding To Primary School Maths
Members of the Government Peter Dutton, Matthias Cormann and backbencher Barnaby Joyce have bandied together to call on the Prime Minister to increase funding for primary school maths. The call comes after backbencher Joyce was the latest victim of being… Read More ›
Cormann To Auction Off Calculator Used In LibSpill To Raise Funds For Bushfire Victims
Finance Minister Matthias Cormann has announced today that he will auction off the calculator that he used to crunch the numbers for the Minister for the Dark Arts, Peter Dutton during the last Liberal leadership spill to raise funds for… Read More ›
Aussie School Kids Defend Their Performance In Maths With 12 Out Of 10 Of Them Thinking They Are On Par With Other Countries
Australian School kids have reacted angrily to a report suggesting that they are at least three years behind the leading countries in mathematics with 12 out of 10 of them taking to Instagram to complain about the study. “How can… Read More ›
Cabinet To All Pitch In And Buy Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann A Calculator For Christmas
With the end of the parliamentary year in sight Scott Morrison’s cabinet have done a whip around with everybody chipping in to buy Senate Leader Matthias ‘Numbers Man’ Cormann a calculator for Christmas. “In an ideal world we would have… Read More ›