Australia is facing a bleak future after it was revealed that due to covid lock downs an entire generation of children will be growing up unable to play the triangle, finger paint or know the rules of “heads down thumbs… Read More ›
Melbourne
PM Asks Staff For The 458th Time Whether They’re Sure That He Shouldn’t Post A Pic Of Him Cooking A Curry
Prime Minister for Sydney, Scott Morrison, currently locked down in Kirribilli with his closest 48 media advisers has been driving them all up the wall by constantly asking them whether or not he should post a picture on social media… Read More ›
ScoMo Urges Melbournians To Dig Deep And Send Cash To NSW
Prime Minister for Sydney (and occasionally the rest of the country) Scott Morrison has urged Melbournians to dig deep and give generously to the people locked down in NSW. In a statement today, he announced that the government is currently… Read More ›
Victoria Facing A Massive Outbreak Of Schadenfreude
The State of Victoria is facing a massive outbreak of schadenfreude. The outbreak occurred in the same week that the state of NSW had an explosion of Covid cases with near lockdown restrictions enforced. ”To the people of NSW I… Read More ›
ScoMo Tells Victorians No Job Keeper But Government Will Send Thoughts And Prayers
Australian Prime Minister Scotty from Hillsong’s marketing department has told Victoria that his Government will not bring back job keeper for the current lockdown that the State is enduring. However, they will provide the State with an infinite supply of… Read More ›
Joyce Offers His Prick To Help Out With The Vaccination Campaign
Aspiring Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has offered to help kickstart Australia’s struggling vaccination program by donating his prick. ”I am if anything a man of the people, so ladies of Australia line up to get my prick,” said… Read More ›