Low rating Sky News talking head Andrew Bolt has called on his viewers, all 6 of them, to storm the Victorian capital and protest Dan Andrews’ election win. ”Peta Credlin, Rowan Dean and Myself didn’t vote for Dan Andrews, so… Read More ›
Rupert Murdoch
Lil’ Paul Murray Upset That Daddy Rupert Says He Can’t Play With Trump
Low rating Sky News host lil’ Paul Murray has thrown an almighty tantrum after Daddy Rupert said he was not allowed to play with his American friend lil’ Donny Trump anymore. ”Lil’ Paul doesn’t have many friends, or viewers for… Read More ›
Sky News Celebrates Record Ratings, Thanks All 3 New Viewers
Niche news network Sky News Australia has issued a press release to announce record high levels of ratings following their round the clock coverage of condemning Meghan Markle. ”What an achievement to gain a whole new 3 viewers,” said a… Read More ›
Bolt Pledges To Never Get Out Of Bed To Avoid Being Woke
Low rating Sky News TV host Andrew Bolt has pledged that he will no longer leave his bed so as to avoid being woke. ”I call upon my fellow conservative soldiers to join me in a sleep in against wokeness,”… Read More ›
News Corp Signs Cardinal Pell As Columnist With Hope That He’ll Touch The Youth Of Australia
News Corp Australia has signed Cardinal Pell as their new columnist in the hope that the Cardinal can reach out and touch the youth of the Nation. ”As the audience ages News Corp need to reach a younger demographic,” said… Read More ›
Dutton Celebrates Surviving The Week With All His Horcruxes Intact
Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has celebrated surviving the first week of Parliament with all his horcruxes intact. ”The Dark Lord has survived a bruising first week,” said a Spokes Death Eater for the Dark Lord. ”Harry Albanese… Read More ›