Evil supervillain and Immigration minister Scott Morrison could be heard cackling loudly to himself in his office at Parliament House after his immigration bill passed the Senate in the early hours of December 5, a source told The (Un)Australian.
“HAHAHAHA, my plans are coming to fruition!” the source said they clearly heard the federal member for Cook loudly declare, accompanied by the clear sound of a fist thumping the desk. “Today, total power over the puny lives of asylum seekers, tomorrow… the world!”
“I laugh at their pathetic Senate oversight!” the source said the Minister for Immigration and Border Protection continued. “Ha ha! What do I, Scott Morrison, soon-to-be Overlord over All Humanity, need with their so-called Senate oversight!”
In an apparent reference to comments during the debate by Greens Senator Sarah Hanson-Young, Morrison was heard insisting: “Call me a sociopath do they? I’ll show them! I’ll show them all!”
“Let’s see who’s making clever speeches when I deport every wishy-washy bleeding-heart tree hugger to Cambodia! Hahahahahaha!!!”
The source said a quick glance around the door confirmed the minister was indeed stroking a cat.
Carlo Sands
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