Dutton Calls On Chinese Checkers To Be Renamed Freedom Checkers

The Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has called upon the popular board game Chinese Checkers to be renamed ‘Freedom Checkers’ in an effort to punish China for the ongoing animosity between the two counntries.

”I am appalled that children in Schools are sitting down to a friendly game of Chinese checkers,” said the Dark Lord. ”What is Prime Minister Albanese going to do about this?”

”It should be called ‘Freedom Checkers” and all the pieces decorated in the colours of the Australian flag.”

When asked why he was using his role as Opposition leader to antagonise China, the Dark Lord said: ”Gotta antagonise someone.”

”Besides, what else am I to do, listen to what the voters said about us at the last election,”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to grab some children to have a photo taken with me playing ‘Freedom Checkers’ then I might stop off at the pet store and find some puppies to strangle.”

Mark Williamson


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