Tony Jones To Mediate Peace Talks In Iraq

Tony Jones

Lateline presenter and occasional guardian of democracy Tony Jones has been appointed by United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki Moon to mediate peace talks between the Islamic State of Iraq and the Lavant.

The appointment comes in recognition of Jones’ enormous success in  facilitating constructive and intelligent dialogue on the ABC’s QandA program. Since first taking the QandA chair, Jones has consistently created an environment in which panellists feel comfortable engaging in  a robust but respectful exchange of views.

Jones has told The (un) Australian  that he hopes to bring the same kind of relaxed and jovial atmosphere to Iraq that enabled Clive Palmer to feel comfortable refering to the Peoples Republic of China Politburo Standing Committee as “those Chinese mongrels who execute their own people.”

In a brief statement to 3AW’s Tom Elliot, a protester pretending to be ISIL spokesman Abu Mohammad al-Adnani said: “These talks will achieve nothing. We have nothing to say to them. If we see Jones, he will executed as an example to anyone who seeks to obstruct and interfere with our mission.”

When put to Jones, the ABC presenter lent forward, raised his hand to his chin and chuckled: “I think we might take that as a comment.”

Nathan Lentern is The (un) Australian’s “Mathew Farthing was on another assignment and unavailable” correspondent. 

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