Shorten To Consider Banning Foreign Investment In Sam Dastyari

Opposition leader Bill Shorten has told reporters that following the 4 Corner’s investigation into Chinese investment in Australian politics that he will consider banning all foreign investment into the burgeoning industry that is Sam Dastyari.

Speaking to The (un)Australian Bill Shorten explained his thinking, saying: “Sam Dastyari or Dasher as he’s known on the bus is very appealing to investors with his witty memes and funny jibes. But if we want to be taken seriously we must limit investment into Sam to local benefactors like the CFMEU or the usual faceless men.”

When tweeted for comment Senator Dastyari replied via twitter: “.@TheUnOz My comments are behind a pay wall. LOL.”

Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull when reached for comment said: “Did you say Dastyari? Oh splendid, I thought you wanted to talk about Andrew Robb. This has really made my day I must tell Lucy.”

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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