Yassmin Abdel-Magied Deportation Reaffirms Miranda Devine’s Belief In God

When news broke that Australian citizen Yassmin Abdel-Magied’s had been deported from the United States filtered through to The Daily Telegraph’s offices, columnist Miranda Devine begun weeping with joy and shouting: “There is a God, yes, there is a God!”

“I need to apologise to my colleagues but sometimes when you get good news you just have to celebrate it,” said a jubiliant Devine. “I mean you hope and pray that something like this would happen but you’re never sure if God hears your prayers. Especially now as it’s the Commonwealth games and he has a lot of prayers from athletes to answer.”

Like Devine, other columnists such as Andrew Bolt and Rita Panahi were also feeling in a celebratory mood.

Bolt said of the news: “It’s been a tough week, what with Malcolm not resigning when he hit 30, but this news is just great. Think of the columns, opinion pieces and Sky News stories I’ll be able to churn out, this’ll keep me busy for months.”

Newscorp has cancelled all leave for columnists and journalists (sic) and has promised to cover Yassmin Abdel-Magied 24/7, so business as usual really.

Mark Williamson

You can check out our new show Decennium Horribilius at this year’s Sydney Comedy Festival. Hosted by The (un)Australian, the quiz show features teams of some of Sydney’s best comics trying to answer questions about the decade of the 1990s — with prizes for the audience.

Saturday May 5, 5.30pm. The Factory Theatre. Book tickets here.

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