BREAKING: Peter Dutton Promises To Continue Being An Arsehole If Re-Elected

dutton

Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has kicked off his re-election campaign for the seat of Dickson in Queensland by promising constituents that should they re-elect him he will continue to be the same old arsehole that he has been since he was initially elected.

” A lot of promises tend to be made during election campaigns but not many are actually acted upon,” said the Minister. “To the people of Australia look at my record, my actions speak for themselves. I am and will continue to be an arsehole.”

“I mean did you see what I did this morning, having a go at my opponent for being disabled. Tell me those aren’t the actions of an arsehole.”

When asked why he felt acting like an arsehole was a desirable trait in a politician Minister Dutton replied: “You journo’s don’t know what it’s like in the real world. My world. Everyday I have to deal with people and the law telling me what I can and cannot do. Well no more. I am Peter Dutton and I will be Australia’s next supreme ruler.”

“Now if you’ll excuse me I saw a little girl in a pram around the corner with a lollipop. I’m going to take that lollipop and teach her a lesson on taxation.”

Mark Williamson 

www.twitter.com/MWChatShow

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook



Categories: Politics

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

4 replies

  1. Bul shit news

    Like

  2. Your a cckroch Dutton!

    Like

  3. if he was not a bent POS, that is exactly how he would approach his election campaign, best i doon’t hold my breath for that day !!

    Like

  4. Dutton the king of arseholes enjoyed looking up young musicians arses when he was a drug detective bottom burper searcher.
    The sooner he is flushed away being the shitty shitty turd of Human waste that he is the better

    Like

Leave a comment