NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian has announced that this year’s New Year’s Eve fireworks display will be cancelled due to the bushfires with pokies machines to be wheeled onto the bridge as an appropriate replacement.
“We consulted with the appropriate authorities and decided it was just not appropriate to have the fireworks this year,” said the Premier. “However a bridge full of pokies machines is not a bad replacement.”
“How cool is that? You can sit on the icon that is the harbour bridge and gamble the night, neigh the decade away.”
When asked whether she thought a massive gambling promotion was the best way to promote the State to the World, the Premier said: ”Name a better way to promote the State?”
”Let’s face it, we don’t want time wasters from overseas visiting our beaches or eating at our restaurants we just want them pumping their cash through our casinos.”
”Now if you’ll excuse me I’m off to try and off load some second hand fireworks to Queensland.
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