Opposition leader and self-described friend of the worker, Peter Dutton, has declared that any Government that he leads will allow the Nation’s Tradies to be able to bully Uni students out of their lunch money.

”What sort of World do we live in when our poor hard working tradies have to walk past Uni students and aren’t able to shake them down for cash,” said the Opposition leader. ”Anthony Albanese, needs to stop pandering to the inner-city leftie elites with his cuts to HECS and get out their and look after our beloved Tradies.”

”Why can’t we get a negative gearing type scheme going for flannelette shirts?”

When reached for comment on the Opposition leader’s anti-Uni students policy, a Spokesperson for the National Union of students said of the idea: ”Jokes on Dutton, no Uni student that I know has any lunch money on them.”

”What with rent, HECS, books, bus fare, to be honest I’m not sure when the last time I actually bought lunch was.”

”I mean I dived a good dumpster the other day and got some great day old bagels.”

”Well, I would’ve enjoyed them if I wasn’t boycotting anything Jewish over the whole situation in Gaza.”

”Anyway, got to head off to my part-time job, I’m lucky, I get to follow Barnaby Joyce around parliament and make sure he is always stocked up with frangers.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter @TheUnOz or like us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/theunoz.

We’re also on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theunoz

The (un)Australian Live At The Newsagency Recorded live, to purchase click here:

Categories: Politics

Tags: Anthony Albanese, auspol, Bagels, Barnaby Joyce, Bridget McKenzie, budget, Dumpster Diving, Frangers, Gaza, HECS, Insiders, Part-Time Job, Peter Dutton, Politics, QandA, Tradies, University