A defiant deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has escalated his ongoing feud with Malcolm Turnbull by pledging to bang a Staffer on the Prime Minister’s own desk. “The Australian public and more importantly Australian businesses don’t want to hear about… Read More ›
7:30report
Nationals Call On Expert Knivesperson Shorten To Take Out Joyce
The National party having failed to do it themselves have outsourced the job of knifing their leader Barnaby Joyce to Canberra’s most experienced knifesperson Labor leader Bill Shorten. “We tried to knife Barnaby but when we got to his office… Read More ›
Joyce Tipped To Replace Dutton As Minister For Home Affairs
Belegaured Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce is tipped to replace Peter Dutton as Minister for Home Affairs in a soon to be announced cabinet reshuffle. “When you make a mistake like Barnaby has you can either take the fall and… Read More ›
Ministry Warns Of The Rise Of The Dark Lord
Malcolm Turnbull’s cabinet are growing increasingly fearful that he is risking the rise to power of the Dark Lord by continually saying his name out loud. Foreign Minister, Julie Bishop, this morning spoke nervously: “None of us want to see… Read More ›
Australia To Be Powered By Burning Copies Of Finkel Review
The coalition will guarantee Australia’s long term energy security by replacing coal fired power stations with power stations that run on the combustion of copies of the Finkel review. “If fire was good enough for the neanderthals than it’s good… Read More ›
Police Issue “Run, Hide, Tell” Alert To One Nation Candidates
Police have sent a message to the mobile phones of all prospective candidates of Pauline Hanson’s One Nation party advising them to run as fast as they can away from the Queensland senator, to hide their cars from Rod Culleton… Read More ›