Prime Minister (ed. please check if this is still the case) Malcolm Turnbull has stunned the mathematics world by claiming that the number 40 is now the new number 30. “Young people are maturing a lot later in life now… Read More ›
Bill Shorten
Abbott Joins Dutton To Call For The Wallabies To Be Renamed The All Whites
Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott, famous for once knighting a Prince, has joined Minister for Immigration Peter Dutton in calling for Australia’s rugby union team the Wallabies to be renamed ‘the All Whites.’ “I believe a lot of Australians would… Read More ›
Dutton Says Australia Is Open To The White Type Of Asylum Seekers
Minister for Immigration, Border Protection and Making Lord Voldemort Look Like a Saint Peter Dutton has declared that Australia is open to accepting the white type of asylum seekers. Speaking to the Daily Telegraph’s columnist Miranda Devine on her live… Read More ›
Morrison Condemns Labor’s Proposed Champagne And Caviar Tax
Treasurer Scott Morrison has launched a scathing attack on the Labor parties proposed champagne and caviar tax claiming it unfairly targets pensioners. “Can you believe the hide of Bill Shorten. These pensioners have worked hard their whole life and all… Read More ›
Australia Shocked To Learn That Shorten Not Abbott Actual Opposition Leader
The Australian people are today in shock to learn that Bill Shorten not Tony Abbott is the countries official opposition leader. The discovery was made when a press conference was held to announce the opposition’s tax changes for pensioners policy… Read More ›
Australia’s Way Of Pronouncing Aluminium Finally Pays Off
American President Donald Trump’s decision to exempt Australia from steel and aluminium tariffs has been celebrated wildly in Canberra, with insiders saying it was down to the way Australia pronounced “aluminium” that confused President Trump into thinking it was a… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 