“George is feeling pretty unwell and not really up to flying to Australia for your hearing,” Cardinal George Pell’s doctor has written in a letter to the Royal Commission Into Child Sexual Abuse. Although the exact details of Pell’s illness… Read More ›
AFL club Essendon have made a decisive move away from the taint of drug scandal by signing former Fremantle tagger Ryan Crowley, with a source inside the club telling The (un)Australian that “we really needed a clean skin here to move… Read More ›
The world’s climate scientists have responded to the release of a major new report by collectively resolving to spend the rest of their time, before global warming-induced eco-holocaust renders human civilisation unsustainable, getting really, really drunk. “We’ve just gotten sick… Read More ›
Denying they were not taking the seizure of a government building by 150 heavily armed militiamen in Oregon seriously, US authorities said today they were developing detailed plans for the decisive use of force against the Oregon occupiers “the very second it… Read More ›
Fresh on the heels of his smash hit Internet comedy shorts for the NSW Government, it has been confirmed that Hollywood is calling for everyone’s favourite hilariously unmotivated mammal — with plans for Stoner Sloth to star alongside Seth Rogan in… Read More ›
Radio broadcaster and failed NRL coach Alan Jones called for Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull to enlist the Australian Army in a “boots on the ground” invasion to secure Parramatta (Pirtek) stadium. The veteran broadcaster made the call for military intervention… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 