Former deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has sent a memo around to all parliamentary staffers calling on them to be sure to wash their hands before he attempts to seduce them. The memo is designed to stop the spread of… Read More ›
Insiders
Abbott Tells ScoMo To Bring Back Knights And Dames To Lift The Public Mood
Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott has called upon current Prime Minister Scott Morrison to lift the mood of the country by bringing back knights and dames. ”Bushfires, drought, corona and now a toilet paper shortage the people of Australia are… Read More ›
“Government Should Stimulate The Economy By Increasing Family Benefits,” Says Barnaby Joyce
Former deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce took some time out from collecting discarded cans to tell the Government that the best way to stimulate the economy is by increasing the family benefit payments. “Look if there’s one thing I know… Read More ›
PM Accused Of Fueling Toilet Paper Sales By Telling The Country To Cook Their Neighbour A Curry
The Prime Minister has been accused of fueling the toilet paper hysteria by encouraging the nation to cook their sick neighbour a curry. The Prime Minister’s comments were made at a Corona virus briefing. “Whilst I won’t condemn the Prime… Read More ›
Mob Attacks Cute Puppy For Stealing Toilet Paper
An angry mob has torn apart a cute white Labrador puppy after the animal attempted make off with a length of Kleenex toilet paper. “He may be adorable and fluffy but these are desperate times and every sheet is precious,”… Read More ›
One Nation Offers Up Their Policy Plans To The Nation Should Australia Run Out Of Toilet Paper
Pauline Hanson’s One Nation party has moved to reassure Australia that in the event of the country running out of toilet paper, they will make available to their supporters printed copies of their policies to use in it’s place. “I… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 