After checking the latest polls, 50 year old Scott Morrison has announced that Prime Ministers will now be eligible for the pension when they turn 51. “I’ve taken a second look at the budget figures and concluded that the nation… Read More ›
John Howard
“Forty Is The New Thirty” Claims Malcolm Turnbull
Prime Minister (ed. please check if this is still the case) Malcolm Turnbull has stunned the mathematics world by claiming that the number 40 is now the new number 30. “Young people are maturing a lot later in life now… Read More ›
Metamucil To Release Commemorative John Howard Blend
Fibre supplement maker Metamucil have announced their plans to release a commemorative John Howard blend onto the market. The move was said to be inspired after hearing about Bob Hawke branded beer. Speaking to The (un)Australian Metamucil CEO Bob Regular… Read More ›
John Howard Heckled At CFMEU Open Mic Comedy Night
Former Prime Minister John Howard is recovering today after being heckled at a CFMEU open mic comedy night. The incident occurred when Mr Howard popped in to try out some new material. Speaking to The (un)Australian Mr Howard’s wife Janet… Read More ›
The Australian School Of Eyebrow Grooming Awards John Howard Honourary Doctorate
Former Prime Minister and curer of insomnia, John Winston Howard has today been awarded an honourary Doctorate from the Australian school of grooming. The award is for his tireless devotion to raising awareness among males of the need to groom… Read More ›
Former Prime Minister John Howard Discovers Cure For Insomnia
Former Prime Minister and eyebrow enthusiast John Winston Howard has stumbled upon a cure for insomnia. Mr Howard recently filmed an ABC documentary on another former prime minister, Sir Robert Menzies, and test screenings showed it was 100% effective in putting… Read More ›
The (un)Australian 