Australia’s Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has sent a message to Victorians who are currently enduring the countries most stringent lock down measures, to stay inside, stay safe and live vicariously through their Prime Minister. “We are all Victorians,” said… Read More ›
Melbourne
Kelly Gang Commended For Wearing Masks
Dan Andrews has praised outlaw Ned Kelly and his gang for following the correct mask wearing protocol while going about their business of robbing banks and ranging about in the bush. “I watched the video Ned put up on YouTube… Read More ›
Melbourne To Widen Laneways To Make Them Covid Safe
Melbourne’s iconic laneways will be widened to a minimum width of 50 metres in an effort to make them covid-19 friendly spaces. “In time people will come to know Melbourne as a city of broad boulevards full of totally not… Read More ›
World’s Introverts Declare Melbourne The World’s Most Live Able City
The World Association of Introverts (WAOI) have declared today via press release that they consider the Australian city of Melbourne as the World’s most live able city, following news that parts of the city has been put in to lock… Read More ›
Abbott Asks Wife To Bake Him A Cake Big Enough To Hide A Hacksaw
Former Minister for Women Tony Abbott has told friends of how he asked his wife Margie to bake him a cake big enough to conceal a hacksaw so that he could surprise his dear friend and confidant George Pell with… Read More ›
Glue Industry Pissed Off That Dog Food Industry Gets All The Best Horses
The glue industry has issued a strongly worded press release today attacking the dog food industry for taking all the best deceased race horses and leaving them with the also-rans. “It’s time that the dog food industry got off it’s… Read More ›