Clive Palmer Blames Ice Epidemic On Delaying Titanic 2


Mining magnate, golf course owner and sometimes politician, Clive Palmer has today condemned the current ice epidemic sweeping through Australia and blamed it on causing delays with his company’s plans to rebuild the Titanic.

Currently the drug ice is sweeping through Australia to such a degree that Prime Minister Tony Abbott has committed to fighting a war against it, he has also called on his top advisers to work on a powerful 3 word election winning slogan similar to his famed ‘Stop the Boats.’

Just what the drug ice has to do with the ship Titanic is beyond us however we reached out to Mr Palmer for comment to which he replied, “Isn’t it obvious? Rupert Murdoch invented the drug ice because he knows that ice sunk the first Titanic so naturally it would sink the second. He’s clearly out to get me, who sent you? Did you kill my Dinosaur?”

The (un)Australian reached out to Rupert Murdoch via twitter for comment however he had not replied by the time we went to press.

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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