Bill Shorten Issues Q&A Boycott As Well

shorten and abbott
Opposition leader Bill Shorten has issued instructions to Labor MPs to also boycott Q&A in the wake of the controversial appearance of Zaky Mallah on the show.

The announcement is the latest in a series of bipartisan moves by the Opposition to show that the Labor Party can be just as tough as the Liberal Party on national security, boat people and straw men. Especially Middle-Eastern straw men.

Shorten told The (un)Australian: “We have shown that we can make the hard decisions, straight after someone else has made them and they poll well.

“We’ve done so by adopting the turn back the boats policy and offshore detention and we’ve done so by ensuring that the turn back the boats message isn’t sullied by the mandatory reporting of child sexual abuse in our offshore detention centres.

“Because there are more important things than protecting children from sexual abuse, like getting the right shade of blue tie… well the ties seem to be working for Tony.

“And now we’re boycotting Q&A, the enormous mistake of letting an idiot speak freely on the ABC has provided us a fantastic opportunity to duck some scrutiny by the national broadcaster for a while.

“But don’t worry we’ll continue to hold the government to account by agreeing with every inhumane policy they implement, promise to keep those policies should we get into government and help prosecute anyone who disagrees with Tony Abbott.”

Television industry analysts have declared there could be a bright side to the boycotts for the ABC. Beth Grant told The (un)Australian: “The episodes without politicians rate really well, but spare a thought for the television repair shops. People are much less likely to throw stuff at their TV without regular appearances from Chris Pyne.”

Ryan Crawford

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