Canberra’s Telstra Tower To Be Renamed in Honour Of Hometown Boy James Hird


Australia’s capital city Canberra has today announced that they will be renaming their iconic Telstra tower which overlooks the city the ‘James Hird Prick’ in honour of the Essendon great and hometown boy James Hird.

A Canberra spokesperson told The (un)Australian: “We don’t have many Canberra natives, so when we got one that excels we like to honour them. After all there’s only so many politicians to name a roundabout after.

“So with James in the news lately, we thought what a time to rename the Telstra tower in his honour. I think a lot of people will see the connection as the tower looks like a giant syringe and is shaped like a prick, fits Hirdy like a glove.”

James Hird could not be reached for comment, however his people indicated that he will be revealing his thoughts on the ‘James Hird Prick’ at a latter date in all forms of media for the next several years.

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Sport

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