Federal Police investigating Australia’s biggest ever tax fraud case have impounded a Dunlop Volleys shoe box full of receipts that they believe is the sole accounting system for the entire scheme.
“The conspirators would toss every bit of paperwork relating to the scheme into the shoe box and then desperately rummage through it the night before the deadline for putting in their tax return,” said head AFP detective Kate Loophole. “Our best accountants will be spending weeks sorting out the pile of receipts from the two dollar shop with the name of the purchased item hastily scrawled on it with a biro, those bits of paper that come stuck to the top of things the couriers deliver to your door and old movie ticket stubs that have been through the wash.”
The syndicate allegedly ripped millions off the government by claiming just about every purchase they made as a tax deduction for their non existent jobs as screenwriters.
“I claimed to be writing a movie about a guy who likes hookers, cocaine and fast cars who takes lots of holidays on the French Riviera,” said accused gang member Phil Dodge. “The tax office rumbled me because a guy really writing an Australian movie would only be spending money on anti depressants.”