Australian, American Immigration Policy Still Based On That One Scene From “Scarface”

Officials from the Australian Border Force and the American ICE have confirmed that their entire policy on refugees seeking to enter the country is still based on that one scene from the 1983 movie “Scarface” where Tony Montana lies his way through immigration.

“I make every recruit to Border Force sit down and watch that scene from “Scarface” so they understand that every sob story they hear from a refugee is a lie,” said Peter Dutton. “As soon as we let them into the country they’ll be snorting mountains of cocaine, referring to their guns as “my little friend” and wanting to sleep with their sisters.”

“They may look like meek and mild families on the run from a violent homeland but we know better,” said US Attorney General Jeff Sessions. “Every night I put “Scarface” on the VHS and remind myself that all these guys will be pushing their way around our restaurants saying “bad guy coming through” if we leave as much as a single gap in our border.”

Mr Dutton is maintaining a hardline on refugees despite the fact that his family was allowed into Australia on a temporary visa after their home on the potato planet of Dok was overrun by gobbledoks.

Peter Green

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Categories: Politics

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