“My Husband May Be A C*nt But He’s Not A Monster,” Says Kirilly Dutton


The wife of the Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton has come out strongly in his defence claiming that whilst ‘he may be a real c*nt he is definitely not a monster.’

“I’m sick and tired of people coming out and calling my husband a monster, when it’s just not true,” said Kirilly Dutton. “I mean sure he does some pretty monsterish things like deporting brown people, trying to knife sitting Prime Ministers and strangling the occasional puppy.”

“But who amongst us hasn’t done any of those things, at worst he’s a c*nt but not a monster.”

When asked how it feels to be labelled a monster the Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton said: “At first I was flattered until Kirilly told me that it was not meant as a compliment.”

“Then I pledged to prove to the people that I am not a monster. I don’t care how many brown kiddies I have to deport or imprison to prove that I am not a monster. But by God I will keep deporting and jailing them until the people stop calling me a monster.”

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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4 replies

  1. The beatings will continue until morale improves.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Right on one count, the first one


  3. Dark side will pull him under for sure


  4. It’s only a pube hair’s widith between a c-unt and a monster . . .


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