Barnaby Spewing As Cost Of Froot Loops Skyrockets Due To Drought


Former Special Envoy for the drought and known families man Barnaby Joyce has hit the roof at his local Woolworths after learning that the cost of a box of Froot Loops has risen due to the drought.

“This is unbelievable, how is a little Aussie battler like myself supposed to afford a box or two of Froot Loops for my families,” said Mr Joyce. “I know there is a drought on, trust me, I know but seriously over $6 for a box of Froot Loops.”

“That Toucan has some nerve I tell ya, some nerve. If I were still agriculture Minister I would’ve sorted that bird out and his little coco pops slinging mate too.”

When asked whether he felt any empathy for the struggling farmers and cereal producers Mr Joyce said: “Ah look you know me I have a heart. I’m always there for a farmer and his daughter if you know what I mean.”

“But this isn’t about the farmers this is between me and that prick of a Toucan. I tell you if I see that Toucan and I’m out driving I won’t be stopping.”

“Now if you’ll excuse me I’m off to the Reject Shop to see if they’ve got any close to its use by date cereal going cheap. I got families to feed damn it.”

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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