In breaking news Prime Minister Scott Morrison will later today name News Corp columnist and self-described ‘reformed mathematician’ Miranda Devine as this year’s Australian of the Year.
“This is is a bit of a left field pick, considering Miranda is not on the shortlist let alone in the country,”said a Government Insider. “However we feel it will play well with the papers, well at least Rupert’s papers.”
”And let’s face it that’s all that matters.”
When asked what Miranda Devine had done this year to be parachuted in as Australian of the year, the Government Spokesperson said: ”Miranda spent the entire year overseas in America. She should be awarded for that.”
”What a great effort in improving the country than by taking yourself away from it for a year.”
“I mean have you read some of the rubbish she has written in her column? She once ranted about the city covering a sewer duct, I mean who defends a sewer duct?”
The Australian of the year will be announced live from Canberra later this evening.
You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter @TheUnOz or like us on https://www.facebook.com/theunoz.