Deluded Board Game Sees Two Week Lockdown As Chance To Finally Shine


That “Compendium of Games” that sits inexplicably on your top shelf has fooled itself into thinking that it will actually get its moment in the sun as your family is forced to spend two weeks in virus induced lockdown.

“My choice of twelve exciting plastic disc based games including ludo, Chinese checkers and some weird Go style thing that no-one understands is going to prove irresistible by the second day,” said the quixotic board game from beneath its layer of dust. “I’m going to be such a star the whole family will want to stay in lockdown just so they can keep playing my version of Nine Men’s Morris.”

“He’s completely off his rocker,” sneered the Monopoly set, which regularly gets pulled down off the shelf on a rainy Sunday afternoon. “As if they’d choose him when there’s so much to see on Netflix, SBS on Demand and ABC i-view. You can even watch entire Buster Keaton movies on You Tube. I’m willing to bet the family pulls out Totopoly, Squatter or Go To The Head Of The Class before going anywhere near the Compendium Of Games.”

The Compendium Of Games briefly thought it was going to be brought into action last night when dad got out the step ladder and headed in its direction. Sadly, it was overlooked for that 750 piece jigsaw it’s been sitting on top of for the past thirteen years.

Peter Green


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