NRL Longs For The Days When Their Biggest Problem Was Players Rooting School Kids


Rugby League Chairman Peter V’landys has told reporters that he longs for the day when the biggest problem that he had to deal with was players rooting school kids, as the League looks at dealing with the fallout from potentially postponing or cancelling this year’s season.

“Mate, give me a dozen Bulldogs and a dozen school kids over having to deal with this Corona crap,” said the Chairman. “We are in serious trouble if this season’s gone.”

“We need our TV money to pay for lawyers and hush money.”

When asked how a competition with a billion dollar television deal could possibly be asking the Government for a handout during such tough economic times, the Chairman said: “Ah, come on, give us a break! A billion dollars isn’t that much when you gotta pay hush money and lawyers and, well, you know.”

“Bloody AFL! I don’t know how they do it. How do they keep their sex scandals quiet? I mean, their players visit schools – surely they must root a kid or two.”

Mark Williamson


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