Prime Minister Scotty from marketing and his Minister for the dark arts Peter Dutton have been telling all and sundry of their vindication after a self-commissioned investigation found that the Government was in charge of stopping boats not ships.
”I expect to hear a lot of apologies and retractions today from those in the media and the Labor party, who blamed us for the Ruby Princess fiasco,” said Prime Minister Scotty from marketing. ”As we’ve been saying all along, we stop boats not ships.”
”Heck, I even have a trophy in my office to commemorate that I stopped the boats.”
When asked why he and his Minister for the dark arts were at pains to differentiate between boats and ships, the Prime Minister said: ”There is a big difference between a boat and a ship. Boats carry people we don’t want in Australia.”
”Whereas ships carry quiet Australians. Australians who like to watch Ninja Warrior and the NRL, tradies and other salt of the earth Liberal voting people.”
”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go see Alex Hawke’s in-laws to see if they can help me book a cruise for Myself, Jen and the girls. I hear Hawaii is good this time of year”
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