Fresh off the news of the alleged assassination attempt against felon turned Presidential nominee, Donald Trump, Sky News Australia is reporting of an assassination attempt against Coalition leader, Peter Dutton, after a man was seen nearby carrying a potato peeler.

”When is the Albanese Government going to act on the dangerous weapons that are potato peelers,” said Dutton sycophant Andrew Bolt. ”They could take an eye out you know.”

”Poor Peter, so brave.”

When asked whether the assassination attempt actually happened or whether it was cooked up to help prop the unpopular Opposition leader up in the ratings, Mr Bolt said: ”Did you say cook up in regards to an attempt on Peter Dutton’s life with a potato peeler?”

”You leftist swine are unconscionable.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and do a ring around to raise some funds to help Peter recover from this traumatic attack. I’m sure Gina will be happy to kick in a few million.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: Politics

Tags: Albo, Andrew Bolt, Anthony Albanese, Assassination Attempt, auspol, Australia, Insiders, Peeler, Peter Dutton, Potato Peeler, Propaganda, QandA, satire, Sky News, The Bolt Report, Trump