The Coalition have announced today a new policy whereby every Australian will be made to pay a levy, which will cover them in case they offend former Senator Linda Reynolds in anyway in the future.

”A Coalition Government wants to take the burden off our courts,” said Opposition leader Sussan Ley. ”So, we think it best that all Australians pay a levy to appease Linda Reynolds.”

”That way Linda won’t have to go around suing everybody.”

When asked how a former Liberal Senator suing a rape victim into bankruptcy will help the Coalition appeal to more women, Sussan said: ”Linda’s case will definitely appeal to the Karen’s of the World and we’ll settle for that.”

”Besides, the young women folk will come back to the Coalition when they see the array of brains and beefcake that we have on our benches.”

Barnaby Joyce, Ted O’Brien and little Danny Tehan, they’ll come back, surely they’ll come back.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: Media

Tags: auspol, Australia, Barnaby Joyce, Brittney Higgins, Bruce Lehrmann, Coalition, Defamnation, Female Voters, Insiders, Labor, Liberal, Linda REynolds, Nationals, QandA, satire, Sky News, Susan Ley, Western Australia, Women