The Opposition’s newest talisman, Barnaby Joyce, has spent the weekend asking his colleagues to jump. This directive has been met with a smile from interim Opposition leader, Sussan ‘SS’ Ley, and a query of how high?

”It’s a sign of how unified we all are that Barnaby is now talking to us,” said SS Ley. ”I see great things ahead for the Coalition, first we ditch net-zero and then we get Barnaby back.”

”Who knows what’s next.”

When asked if she really believed that it was possible to honour the Paris agreement whilst ditching net-zero, SS Ley said: ”Of course it is, Barnaby said he is willing to go and spend time with Paris Hilton to ensure she’s an ally.”

”In fact he was quite graphic in the lengths he was willing to go to in order to keep us, or maybe himself, in Paris.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, Barnaby is busy today and he’s asked me to mow his lawns.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: Politics

Tags: Andrew Hastie, Angus Taylor, auspol, Australia, Barnbay Joyce, climate change, Coalition, Insiders, Jump, Labor, Liberal, LibSpill, Nationals, Net Zero, News POll, Polling, satire, Sky News, SS Ley, Sussan Ley