Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has joined the Greens in calling for a ban on the election day sausage sizzle. Mr Turnbull currently in northern NSW, helping clean up flood damage, one photo opportunity at a time, launched his anti-sausage sizzle policy by turning down a sausage offered to him.
Speaking to The (un)Australian Prime Minister Turnbull explained his anti-sausage stance, saying: “When I make an appearance at the ballot box I expect something a little more appetising than a sausage. Come on Australia get agile and innovative how about a little foie gras or some snails? My personal chef makes a divine duck liver pate.”
A spokesperson for the Greens welcomed Mr Turnbull’s call for a ban on sausage sizzles, saying: “It’s about time people other than us called for a ban on sausages. Their phallic nature and meaty aroma is enough to make you sick. Ban the sausage and if the people don’t like it then let them eat mung bean cake.”
Mr Turnbull has yet to put his sausage sizzle ban to cabinet however it is not expected to be met positively with Nationals leader Barnaby Joyce saying: “He wants to ban what? First they came for my semi-automatic and I said nothing. Then they came for my sausage, well they will have to take it from my cold dead hand.”