Turf War Breaks Out Between Orange And Yellow Hi-vis Wearers

high viz

Police have appealed for calm after the tense stand off between workers who wear hi-vis work gear escalated last night following the drive by shooting of an orange hi-vis wearing Irish traffic controller by a gang of yellow hi-vis wearing crane operators.

“We’re going to the mattresses”, said forklift driver Neville Bonger, alleged wartime consigliore of the orange hi-vis work wear wearers. “They can run from us but they can’t hide, especially while wearing that glowing yellow shade of hi-vis.”

“They talk big but we’re feeling all mellow here dressed in our yellow”, said electricity meter reader Charlene Tilton, alleged head of one of the biggest yellow hi-vis wearing families on the east coast. “Try and make a clever rhyme like that you orange hi-vis wearing twats.”

The current violence was sparked by an incident at lunchtime last Friday at a take away shop in a light industrial area in Peakhurst when a bunch of orange hi-vis wearing water bottle deliverymen pushed into the line ahead of a group of yellow hi-vis wearing powerpole repairers who were waiting to buy salad rolls, donuts and cartons of Farmers Union iced coffee.

Former Labor leader Bill Shorten has been called in to mediate the dispute, and he is expected to hold talks with leaders of both side tomorrow whilst dressed in a pair of old blue overalls.

Peter Green

www.twitter.com/Greeny_Peter

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