NSW Government Announces Plans To Privatise Its Citizens

Gladys Berejiklian

The NSW Government fresh off privatising their bus services despite going to an election earlier this year saying they would not, has now announced their latest splash for cash with a plan to privatise the State’s citizens.

“If we want a better NSW then we need everyone on board contributing and by everyone I mean those who earn less than $100k a year who don’t gamble,” said NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian. “The nerve of these people, not gambling or buying apartments and paying stamp duty is just beyond belief.”

“By privatising we will ensure that everyone is doing their fair share.”

When asked how you privatise a citizen the Premier responded: “Oh that’s easy we will allow big companies to buy naming rites for a citizen. For instance Claire in accounts will now be known as Sportsbet presents Claire from accounts. Or Bob the butcher becomes Woolworths presents employee number 7123. Simple stuff like that.”

“With all this extra revenue just imagine the beautiful rugby league stadiums we could build or picture this another 5 casinos. Let’s get it done NSW!”

Mark Williamson

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