Former special envoy for the drought and self-confessed families man Barnaby Joyce has been seen out and about in down town Armidale,shopping for a new casting couch for his office, in preparation for his expected return as Leader of the National party.

“I don’t want to jump the gun so to speak out of respect for Bridget, but it doesn’t hurt to be prepared,” said Barnaby Joyce. “Besides my old couch was getting on a bit, the springs were going and there were a few incriminating stains, if you know what I mean.”

When asked why he needed a ‘casting couch’ for his office instead of say a meeting table, Mr Joyce said: “It’s not uncommon in Canberra to pull an all-niter or a root and we can’t have the deputy Prime Minister of Australia check in in to a sleazy pay by the hour motel now can we?”

“Besides a well rested Barnaby is good for the country, not so much for my staffers.”

The National party meets Tuesday to discuss a replacement for deputy leader Bridget McKenzie.

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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