Barnaby Joyce, a man whose greatest parliamentary achievement is being the reason for the bonk ban, is filthy with his colleagues after he was passed over for the shadow ministry of home affairs.

”I mean who in the so-called Coalition has more experience with affairs than myself,” said the member for New England. ”Home affairs, foreign affairs, heck, even veteran affairs I’m the man for the job.”

”Let’s face it, I’m always on the job.”

When asked how he felt about his colleague, Andrew Hastie, being put in charge of home affairs, the former deputy Prime Minister said: ”Andrew Hastie is a straighty 180, what would he know about an affair.”

”Dude wouldn’t even do a shoey from a prosthetic leg.”

”Speaking of getting a leg over, I’m off to do some research, just in case things change.

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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Categories: Politics

Tags: Andrew Hastie, auspol, Australia, Barnaby Joyce, Coalition, David Littleproud, Foreign Affairs, Home Affairs, Insiders, QandA, satire, Sky News After Dark, Sussan Ley, The unAustralian, Veteren Affairs