The (un)Australian

Recent Posts - page 261

• Warner’s Return To Cricket Sees A Rise In Bunnings Warehouse’s Share Price

  By theunozblog on 24/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  Former Australian cricketer David Warner has made his return to club cricket following his suspension for ball tampering and it has resulted in an increase in crowds, plenty of runs (Warner scored 150 odd) and a significant rise in the… Read More ›

• Dutton Announces The Death Penalty For Anyone Who Tampers With A Potato

  By theunozblog on 20/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  Following the recent spate of needles being found in strawberries and other assorted fruits the Minister for the Home Affairs Peter Dutton has announced as a preventative measure that anyone caught tampering with a potato will be put to death…. Read More ›

• Australian Males Baffled By Purpose Of Strange Object Found In Strawberries

  By theunaustralianblog on 19/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  Men throughout Australia are continuing to investigate what might the purpose be of the mysterious pointy metallic objects that keep being found inside strawberries. “It’s a shortish sliver of steel with a hole at end that tapers to a quite… Read More ›

• NRL Blames Low Finals Attendance On Sub-Par Stadiums

  By theunozblog on 18/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  The NRL has blamed the condition of Allianz Stadium as the reason for only 19,000 people turning up to watch the Cronulla sharks play the Penrith panthers last Friday night. “Mate it’s appalling what the fans have to put up… Read More ›

• Liberal Party Introduces 50% Quota For Bullies

  By theunozblog on 17/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  Scott Morrison’s Liberal party has announced that it will introduce quotas into their candidate selection process to ensure that the party is always represented by at least 50% bullies. “We’ve heard what people have said about quotas and we’ve listened,”… Read More ›

• Turnbull Sends Dutton Strawberries As Gesture Of Reconciliation

  By theunaustralianblog on 14/09/2018 • ( 0 )

  

  Malcolm Turnbull has gifted Peter Dutton hundreds of punnets of strawberries in an effort to show that he has no hard feelings following the recent leadership crisis that cost the former PM his job. “I’ve vowed not to be like… Read More ›

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