George Christensen’s Operation To Remove A Benign Bernardi Successful

Queensland National Party Senator (for now) George Christensen is recovering in hospital after Surgeons successfully removed a benign bernardi that had been causing pain.

Surgeon Ian Slicer told The (un)Australian: “It was a routine procedure that most members of the Coalition undertook months ago, but George held off. The benign bernardi is a growth that’s bite is worse than it’s bark so to speak.”

“Sufferers of the benign bernardi feel a sense of entitlement and are prone to fits of anger and intolerance. While not fatal, it can lead sufferers to long-term delusions of grandeur and superiority.”

Senator Christensen said of his recovery: “I do feel better after having the benign bernardi out of me. I feel a lot more tolerant, I mean a hijab-wearing nurse just came in to check up on me and I didn’t yell at her to rack off. That wouldn’t have happened prior to the operation.”

Doctors have warned anyone who think they may be suffering from a benign bernardi to seek medical assistance. Symptoms include a smug look on your face, a growing sense of entitlement and the urge to yell abuse at minority groups.

Mark Williamson

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Categories: Politics

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