The Australian Army over night named former Prime Minister Tony Abbott it’s 2018 Sniper of the year, at the annual Army awards night.
“We are witnessing a sniper that is truly at the top of his game,” said an Army Spokesperson. “He has taken out 5 Prime Ministers in the past 10 years, unbelieveable.”
“Especially when you factor in one of those Prime Ministerships was his own.”
When asked what the secret of his success was Mr Abbott replied: “I am born to take things out. I have axed taxes, stopped boats, eaten onions and by Midday today fingers crossed I will have murdered Malcolm.”
“Now if you’ll excuse me I’m off to do a celebratory triathlon before the Midday meeting.”
Mark Williamson
You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter or like us on facebook
Categories: Politics
Frydenberg Defends Handing Out How To Vote Flyers At Memorial Services 
Barnaby Unsure Why Trump Invaded Voo Voo Zella But Supports Him None The Less 
Barnaby And Pauline To Release Xmas Single: Six White Boomers 
The (un)Australian 
Leave a comment