Former Prime Minister Tony Abbott has called upon his federal colleagues to instigate a Royal Commission into Australia’s public toilet situation. With a particular focus on the number of toilets located in beach side electorates.
“We need to get to the bottom of this public toilet situation,” said Mr Abbott. “We can’t have good honest Australians like Myself or my constituents having to line up to use a toilet.”
When asked why given issues such as climate change, the rising cost of living and housing prices were public toilets suddenly such a hot button issue Mr Abbott replied: “As the member for Warringah I have my finger on the pulse and I know what the people want.”
“This issue of a public toilet shortage is one that has concerned the locals for 25 years and they know it’s time for action to be taken.”
“I shall talk to Prime Minister Morrison and we will get the ball rolling on this Royal Commission. I might call my good friend Alan Jones to come on board, he knows a thing or two about public toilets.”