An anonymous member of Federal Parliament has spoken today of how they are looking forward to new laws that unmask anonymous social media activity, commonly referred to as “trolling”, as it will mean that ministers soon can move their offices back to parliament house from under the bridges that they currently occupy.
“Do you really think we want climate change to turn Australia into a nation-sized hotplate, or for Centrelink to continue its deterioration into an MC-Escher-meets-Hieronymus-Bosch-style nightmare?” said the anonymous MP. ”It’s just that we’re so busy sledging, snarking, and making our talking points look like grassroots sentiment that we’ve got no time to actually fix the place.”
“We could get so much done if we’re not constantly focused on which account we’re supposed to use to congratulate ourselves with.”
“Culture wars don’t stoke themselves, you know!”
Upon being thanked by your correspondent for his time, the MP replied with “Yes. Well done [name withheld]. Great job.”
Matt Elsbury
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