”I’m Not Racist, Some Of The People I used To Arrest Were Indigenous,” Declares Dutton

Opposition leader the Dark Lord Peter Dutton has come out swinging over accusations that he is racist. The Dark Lord told reporters that he can’t be racist, as some of the people that he used to arrest were indigenous.

”Peter’s not racist, he believes that all men are created equal, just some more equal than others,” said a Liberal party insider. ”Besides, you can’t take anything he says seriously he’s just trying to be different to Albo.”

”Albo says it sunny, Pete says it’s overcast, Albo says white, Pete says, well in this case he’d probably also say white, but you get the drift.”

When asked why someone who walked out on the apology, did nothing in 9 years of Government to close the Gap, plays contrarian to the Voice and now has a problem with Indigenous art work being put on the $5 note is not racist, the Liberal party Insider said: ”Well, when you put it like that, you might have a point.”

”But, on the note, that’s more being anti-woke than racist.”

”Besides defending the monarchy is throwing red meat to the base. Sure, the base is a lot smaller than it used to be, but we’ll get there.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and buy Peter a birthday gift, don’t suppose you know where to buy a Golliwog do you?”

Mark Williamson


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