The Missing In Action (MIA) Opposition leader, Peter Dutton, has been found hiding in Woolworths Nerang, dressed as a cash register, in some sort of attempt to camouflage himself in order to sneak behind enemy lines.
”I’ve been doing a stake out so to speak in order to infiltrate the enemy and plant a flag in the name of Australia day,” said the member for Dickson. ”I was in the store for a week and managed to achieve quite a lot.”
”I dug a trench in the deli section and managed to put Australian flag stickers on every jar of Kantong in the place.”
When asked why when the Nation was struggling through a cost of living crisis he was seeking to ignite a culture war, the Opposition leader said: ”This is not a culture war. Culture is something that leftist, woke, inner city trendies discuss.”
”This is a battle for the countries soul.”
”We have already derailed the voice to parliament now we must strive to protect Australia Day at all costs.”
”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I just saw a gentleman with a southern cross tattoo, I must ask if he’d like to be my candidate for the Dunkley bi-election.”
Mark Williamson
@MWChatShow
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