The (un)Australian

Recent Posts - page 186

• Peter V’landys Orders The PM To Force School Kids To Attend All NRL Games

  By theunozblog on 28/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  NRL Boss Peter V’landys has ordered Prime Minister Scott Morrison to arrange for the nation’s school kids to sit in the stands during this weekend’s round of rugby league matches. ”We’ve been told it’s safe for kids to go to… Read More ›

• Nuclear Physicist On Probation After Putting Hot Wheels Cars In Supercollider

  By theunozblog on 27/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  A contrite nuclear physicist at CERN has been severely reprimanded after putting Hot Wheels cars at each end of the Large Hadron Collider and conducting experiments to see if anything cool happens when they crash at high speeds. “We caught… Read More ›

• Dutton And ScoMo Demand The Media Learn The Difference Between Boats And Ships

  By theunozblog on 26/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Prime Minister Scott Morrison and his Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton have called on the media to learn the difference between a ship and a boat after a ship docked in Fremantle with Covid infected crew. ”The media… Read More ›

• ScoMo Gets A Laugh In The Party Room By Asking Cormann To Do Some Basic Maths

  By theunozblog on 26/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Prime Minister Scott Morrison has lifted spirits in the Coalition party room by pulling out his favourite party trick of asking the Finance Minister Matthias Cormann to do some basic maths. ”Scotty really knows how to keep spirits high,” said… Read More ›

• Scotty From Marketing Promises Every School In Australia A Statue Of Captain Cook

  By theunozblog on 25/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Prime Minister Scotty from marketing has promised to use the leftover $60 billion dollars from the Job Keeper program to invest in schools, with plans to build a statue of Captain Cook in every school in Australia. “How good is… Read More ›

• Trump Foils Plot To Assassinate Him With Malaria Bearing Mosquitoes

  By theunaustralianblog on 22/05/2020 • ( 0 )

  

  Donald Trump has foiled a Chinese Secret Service plan to assassinate him with a squadron of highly trained malaria bearing mosquitoes by craftily swallowing an entire bottle of hydroxy-chloroquine. “Curses, we spent months training a crack team of anopheles mosquitoes… Read More ›

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