Liberal Senator and self-professed purveyor of ‘common sense’ Cory Bernardi has leaked to the press that his ego will be named Australian of the year later tonight, in a ceremony to be held in Canberra.
Speaking to The (un)Australian a proud Senator Bernardi spoke of his ego, saying: “When I read the list of nominees for Australian of the year I thought hang on where’s my name? So I called Malcolm Turnbull threatened to take my bat and ball and go home and wouldn’t you know it, my ego is now Australian of the year.”
“My apologies to Andrew ‘Twiggy’ Forrest he would’ve been an acceptable Australian of the year but I need this more than he does.”
When reached for comment Prime Minister Turnbull spoke glowingly of Senator Bernardi’s ego, saying: “There has never been another politician like Cory thankfully, so when he called threatening to quit I thought what the heck, it’s only the Australian of the year award.”
“I mean we gave one to John Farnham does anyone other than the Murdoch columnists actually care about it?”