The international association of identity thieves has today announced that Australia’s former PM/Treasurer/Minister for Industry/Resources/Engadine Maccas and Health to name but a few has been named their Man of the year award.
”What a great honour it is to be awarded this prestigious title,” said the interim member for Cook. ”How good is it, all I have to do to accept it is send them an email with my bank details, Mother’s maiden name and the address of the house I grew up in.”
”Thankfully I have all those details, well they’re not mine but I’m sure Angus Taylor or Brother Stewie will transfer the cash over to me.”
When asked if he felt any remorse over his decision to steal his colleagues Ministries, the former PM said: ”I reject the premise of your question.”
”Until you’ve walked a mile in my shoes, who are you to judge?”
”You don’t know the strain of lining up at Engadine Maccas and having to make the agonising decision to wait for your fries or use the toilet.”
”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I named myself the CEO of KFC the other day and I plan to cash in on that for lunch.”
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