Christensen Begs The Govt To Make Sure Manila Avoids A Bonk Ban

The Morrison/Joyce Government’s former member for Manila George Christensen has begged the Albanese Government to start lobbying the Phillippino Government, so as to avoid them going down the path of Indonesia and instituting a bonk ban.

”In the good old days I’d ring ScoMo and tell him to do what I want or I’d piss on the floor.” said the former member for Dawson. ”Bloody Albo, won’t even take my calls.”

”I’d go on Sky News and have a sook but what’s the point only 3 people would be watching.”

When asked why he was so concerned about another country’s policies on bonking, Mr Christensen said: ”I don’t think the Government should be involved in what happens in people’s bedrooms.”

”Unless of course it’s the gays but that’s another matter.”

”Middle aged men from countries like Australia should be able to head overseas armed with some cash and a few dozen ping pong balls and get up to what they want with who they want.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to talk to Barnaby about bonking, he knows a thing or two in this area.”

Mark Williamson


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